Once I loved so much and true. Quoting Popoy from One More Chance, "You had me at my best, but you chose to break my heart." He had me at my best, but he chose to break my heart. To say that he broke my heart would be an understatement. He shattered my life into pieces. It took me a very long time to put my self back together. I thought I was doing the right thing for us just by loving him unconditionally but it turned out that it was not right after all. I made mistakes that made him leave me even if I thought I was being the best for him. Some mistakes I made 5 years ago made me better. Even if we really loved each other so much, or so I thought, I should've not been so selfish and clingy. I'm thinking maybe I choke him too much. Well I think I really did. It's not my fault that I loved too much, but I know now that it was not healthy. I do not regret that I did but somehow it made me realize that loving someone so much doesn't justify everything.
Wanting to be with him all the time because you both knew from the start that he's gonna leave is understandable but it doesn't mean that you should refrain him from living his own life. Being sweet with each other all the time, as if nothing's wrong in the relationship doesn't mean that what you both have is for eternity. Communication is the key and both of you need to be aware of each other's real feelings. Not arguing with each other doesn't mean that everything's going smoothly. At the end you'll realize that there was just the calm before the storm.
I'm not some love or relationship guru but I've seen and felt different sort of things from 5 years ago to today. So now I know the right thing to do. Be more understanding but always think of fairness, show him that you don't wanna lose him but at the same time give him reasons to be afraid to lose you too. Let him have some time for himself. Coz no matter how much we're in love with another person, we're still individuals and we have our own lives to live and enjoy. Agreeing that both of you are in a relationship and that you love each other doesn't give you the right to forbid him from doing other things that make him happy even if they are sometimes not favorable to you. As long as it's reasonable and it's fair, let him have it. If you feel like something's not right, talk to each other and let each other know how bad you feel about it. I'm sure there's an explanation to what happened. Trust him. Whatever his reasons are, those are his. You can't conclude that he's lying just because his reasons do not seem right to you. If he lied, it's not your fault. What goes around, comes around. Do not be a control freak. He has his own mind too you know. He knows what he's doing and he already had enough preaching and manipulation from his mom since he was younger and he doesn't need it from you anymore. If he chose not to tell you his problems, let him be. He will talk when he feels that it's the right time already. He has his own mind and you need to let him feel and know that you respect that. Just always let him know that you're there for him and that he can confide to you anytime. Be his girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, or whatever, but be his friend too. ♥